SIGNS YOUR SPOUSE IS HAVING AN AFFAIR.
It is a known fact
today that people go into relationships with a great sense of insecurity. This
insecurity occurs from a residual of previous relationships that ended in
disaster. Cheating and infidelity is however the major cause for breakups that occur
in relationships. Study shows that 50-60% of even the most committed men engage
in extramarital affairs, while 45-50% of women, also committed, cheat on their
partners at a particular point in their relationships, so no sacred cow. Note; a strong relationship is based on trust, care,
love and understanding. Therefore, if you noticed any of the things
mentioned below and it is so unlike your partner, then he or she might just be
cheating on you.
·
TRYING TO PROVE INNOCENCE
When people lie, they tend to look for various excuses to backup their
points. They often tell more than the
required in this process. A co-marriage counselor once told me of a client
who explained to her that the very first thing she noticed in her husband was
his long answers to simple questions. Imagine asking, ‘why are you late?’ and
you start listening to a long expository. He or she starts making up stories
that is longer than the entire desperate housewives series, then something is
wrong. Not only this, they also provide a ready alibi (they become a criminal
over-ridden with guilt, but still they try to prove their innocence). Just
think of it, why your partner is going through all this just to prove innocence
over a relatively simple matter. HONEST
PEOPLE GIVE SIMPLE AND STRAIGHTFORWARD ANSWERS.
However, you need to be very careful when using this, he/she may just be
trying to prove a point, and so be a good listener. Sometimes, your partner may
just be a chatterbox, knowing your partner well enough is required in this
regard. Only apply the rule if it is
unlike your partner.
·
CHECK THE BODY LANGUAGE
Reactions are very difficult to control. It takes an entirely strong
personality to do this. Most of our physical reactions occur subconsciously.
Therefore, it is important for you to take note of your partner’s body
languages, this because in their bid to cook up a good and believable story,
they make mistakes, the subconscious however could be your mirror to the truth
and a closer watch at facial expressions
gives out concealed intentions. This may be all you need to catch a
cheater. It includes;
·
Uneasiness and fidgeting
·
Head or neck scratching
·
Avoiding of eye contact
·
Trying to hide face
·
Getting handy e.g. trying to touch or
hold something.
Just look carefully, you will find
the hidden truth through their nervousness
However, in cold weather conditions, some of the aforementioned
attributes may occur, due to exposure to atmospheric conditions. Therefore,
ascertain that it is actually nervousness that is responsible for the naivety
and fidgeting.
·
REPEAT YOUR QUESTIONS
Sometimes we do have smart cheats. They give
a convincing story without fidgeting. To nail this set of people, you need to
repeat your questions after sometime. Once
you notice any inconsistency, then he/she is a lying bastard. They do bring
out new facts and new stories, they sometimes forget the golden rule of a liar,
‘do not forget’. In addition, once they feel you are catching up on them, they
tend to give you the guilt stricken lines, ‘don’t you think I am telling the
truth?’ or ‘don’t you trust me anymore?’…
In this case however, no reversal, they either give you a consistent answer or they are
cheats. Just make sure your questions
are statement-like, do not accuse.
·
PLAY THE DETECTIVE (SHERLOCK HOLMES)
In this case, you have only one suspect, your
partner, not an invincible criminal. Therefore, check every details yourself i.e. the odometer, credit card
details, look at the clothes for strange smells and stains.
However, do not get caught in the act,
because it may totally ruin tour relationship, so play it cool, nice and smart.
Remember, do not accuse your partner, have a
very strong proof before doing so. Give your suspect a lot of time, space and
situations to make a lot of errors. RELATIONSHIP
IS ALL ABOUT TRUST.
Feel
free to post your comments, share your thoughts and question the author. I will
be available to give answers. Thank you for visiting.
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tank u 4 dis dear blogger...it is defntli sumtin i nid...
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